Free Verse · Free verse Poetry · Love · love poem · love quote · micropoetry · Poetry · sadness · words

Forgetting you, 10 years from now 

I often wonder
If maybe
Trying to forget you
Was in vain,

If maybe
I shouldn’t have tried
So hard
To erase every trace of you
From my mind,

If maybe
I should not have wasted
Away my ears
Listening to loud music
That blocked my thoughts
Swarming around your name.

Because
Even after
Having used
So much of my energy
In trying to move on,

What if
Maybe
10 years from now
My last thoughts
Before falling asleep
Would still be of your face
And how I longed to see it
Just once more.

And I’d realize
That somehow
I still could not
Get rid of you

depression · Free Verse · Free verse Poetry · Love · love poem · love quote · Poem · Poetry · prose · sadness

A Heart Turned Black

wp-1480257216208.jpgI wrote over the lines on my heart
Where your name was heavily scribbled,
Replacing each letter with ink
That turned my hand black.
I erased memories and feelings,
Burying them deep underneath,
Hidden away,
So they never threaten to resurface again.

I repeatedly scrawled over
All that was you
And filled in all the empty spaces.
Like a patched up quilt,
I colored each gaping hole
Where missing pieces once resided;
Pieces that didn’t belong to you
But you took anyway.

When I was done
I stepped back
And took a moment
To admire my masterpiece .
I noticed my hand
Which was now all black
Much like my heart
And with no trace of you.

Free verse Poetry · Love · love poem · love quote · Poem · Poetry · Uncategorized

Walls And How They Fall

The walls you’ve built
Will come tumbling down one day
And you’ll feel helpless
Like a child
Reaching for things
With too small arms
And failing.
You’ll wonder
How it got to this
How those walls you intricately built
Could come crashing down so easily.
But here’s the thing,
It wasn’t easy
It wasn’t easy to bring them down
Like it wasn’t easy to put them up.
And I pray for once
That you’d let them stay down,
And I promise
It won’t be too bad
When you’ll see
That someone can finally look in
At who you really are,
And love you for it.

crush · Free Verse · Free verse Poetry · happy · Infinity · letter · Love · love quote · Poem · Poetry · prose · Talent · Uncategorized · World · Writing

Love and Her

In her I had found a gem,
For no eyes that I had ever seen seemed to shine so brightly.
They had left me dazed;
Transfixed, mesmerized, spell bound.
Though beauty was not her strongest trait,
To me she was the most beautiful.
Eyes, though just brown, sparkled;
Like her smile: lopsided, but full of wonder.
I wanted to swim in the deepest oceans of her brain,
Places where no one went.
In her, I saw the true beauty of intelligence and grace;
The true beauty of mankind.
Explanation I had none for the funny feeling in my stomach,
Except that I simply seemed to be in love with her.
After all, What is love if not a feeling?
A feeling that makes the simplest of people seem like celestial beings.

body image · crush · depression · fight · happy · Infinity · letter · Love · love quote · myself · prose · Talent · Uncategorized · World · Writing

A Letter to Myself

Hey there,
I’m not going to fill this letter with sappy over-the-top lines we all know to be rarely true. However, I do promise to be very honest with you.

I need you to know that no matter what you do and how you are, I will always love you. Some days I might love you less, and some days more, but I need you to know I’ll still be loving you somewhere in the corner of my mind.

I know that you have many things that you do not consider right for yourself. I know that you have bad days, and that sometimes you do not try as hard as you should. I know that sometimes you think too much and it kills you, and sometimes you hold yourself back from things that you should be doing. I know sometimes negative thoughts over power you, and sometimes you just do not want to try. I know. I know all that, and despite everything, you are still my favorite human being.

I think that even though your face is not the best, and your body is very far from being even remotely that, I’m glad that you are finally learning to look past your physical appearance. I know that sometimes insecurities get the better of you, and sometimes you feel awful about yourself. I know you get jealous easily about how other girls can look flawless without even trying, and I know how hard you try. I know and I need you to know that you are beautiful in your own self.

I like that you are one of the strongest people I’ve met. You have a remarkably strong will. Despite what you tell yourself, I know that you are deep down very ambitious and there are many things you want to achieve in life. I don’t promise that all of them will come true, but I do promise to help you as much as I can along the way and together we’ll try our best to turn them into your reality. Everybody has lazy days, and sometimes it’s okay to have them. Just remember not to lose sight of what you see for yourself in the future, and I pray to God that for you it becomes true.

Even though I hate to see what you become on your bad days, I need you to know that they do not define you. You can be weak. And though some days you break down into inconsolable tears, it’s alright to let it out sometimes and it does not make you any less. I know sometimes you cannot help but be negative about everything, and I know how life pushes you a lot to the extent where it gets hard for you to cope. But I promise that you will also see good days and on those days you’ll realize that continuing with this life is the best thing you could have done for yourself. I hope that you will be happy. I can’t guarantee complete carefree days but I can promise to help you along the way as much as I can.

I know that you are very independent and strong minded, and I understand and respect that, but you must also know that some days it’s okay to let other people in, it’s okay to let them know what you’re going through, and it’s okay to allow them to grieve and heal with you. It doesn’t have to ‘fix’ anything, but I can tell you, you will feel much better knowing that someone besides me also cares enough to understand and stand by your side.

And when it comes to meeting your ‘soul mate’, if you are lucky enough to find them, you need to know that they may not be how you imagined them to be. They may be completely different to what you pictured. But for that I’ll need you to trust in God, for what He has done for you is right for you. And everything will work out, even if it’s not exactly as you wanted it to.

And if you do decide to give your all to that person, promise me you will not lose who you are. You will grow with them, but you will not forget your roots.

However,  if you happen to never meet that someone, you will not ruin yourself over it. You are much more than you think and you will get by without someone constantly by your side, as you have for so many years. I know that your heart has been broken, multiple times too, and I know that your heart will be broken a lot of times in the future, but I need you to understand that it will be okay.

Lastly, I hope you never lose the friends that you have today because I know you cherish them a lot. Even on your worse days they can make your day bearable without knowing it. It’s because of them you smile a little wider sometimes, and your eyes shine a little brighter. As long as you have them by your side, I promise you that life will not be as bad as you think.

I hope that you keep all this in mind whenever you start to doubt yourself or doubt the plan that God has laid out for you. Though, it may not feel right now that any of this is even remotely correct, one day I hope with all my heart that everything I’ve written here starts to make sense.

For now, just lay back a bit, try to relax, let things come easy, and everything will be okay.

Regards,
You

crush · Love · love quote · Poem · Poetry · prose · self love · Talent · Uncategorized · World · Writing

Amongst the Shelves, a Story Untold

There was something about that particular moment that made it hard for her to focus on the books lying open in front of her. Her heart was pounding within her chest and she could not decipher why. It was not the first time she was in close vicinity with a boy she liked or had feelings for. However, having him sitting right in front of her across the table made it hard for her breathe. His feet under the table were close enough to brush against, and so were his hands, sprawled carelessly on the table, unaware of the other pair of hands itching to touch them. This mere meeting in the library due to lack of available space except for the one in front of her somehow became rather sensual without her consent and she both wanted this uncomfortable, yet blissful feeling, to end and last forever.

crush · depression · fight · Infinity · Love · love quote · prose · Talent · Uncategorized · World · Writing

A Motionless Ride

He sits in the corner, surrounded by friends, just an average boy, laughing and smiling as his day goes by. He’s unaware that the quiet girl who passes by secretly steals a glance towards his face. He is not the best looking, but she is struck by the aura he possesses; the aura of calmness. The smile he mocks in the mirror, she finds it sweet and wonderful. She likes how he is kind with everyone. She likes that he cares about the poor, how he takes time out to throw askew wrappers into the garbage bin. It’s the little things that captivate her. But to her dismay, she is far too afraid to approach him, to give him some sort of sign. She is trapped in her own created heartache; heartache of having him so near yet so far away. If she would just say hi, the friendship that might be pulls at her heart strings. But she is too insecure to confess to the mediocre boy that she feels so strongly for him. She has a plan. She will wait it out, till she has forgotten him, till the feelings bring her nothing but emptiness that she must let go. Till then she’ll hope that he starts to see in her what she sees in him, then maybe he’d have enough courage to come say hi, before time runs out and the cycle must start again in her wayward mind.