anxiety · anxiety awareness · depression · fight · Poem · Poetry · prose · Uncategorized

Lost In Her Mind

Folding, unfolding; her fingers clenched and unclenched
A repeating motion they had become accustomed to use
Her restlessness evident on the edges, tempted to be released
Nerves a bundle, controlling, unwilling to let the tension diffuse

The hair on her arms stood at length; an impending feeling of doom
Ripening anxiety threatened to soar her mind stuck in thought
Dark circles under her eyes worn like an identity for years
Thinning hair, pale skin, going translucent the more she fought

Every task no matter how small required a thorough thought process
Convinced and expecting, the worst was always bound to follow
She required a new set of nails, so she could chew them right off again
Wondering how she could always be so overwhelmed despite feeling so hollow

Calm she looked on the outside, her eyes though always darted from left to right
Like a deer in front of headlights, Feeling exposed and vulnerable had become a trait
Eyes seemed to follow her every move, laughing, mocking as she went along
She saw too much, and she thought too much, her brain distorting under the weight

Nothing made sense to her much, except her one wish for the ground to bury her
How was she to comprehend how to respond to being afraid of your own mind
Every star above her roof had been seen by her through the sleepless nights
She longed to escape that prison of a brain, consistently feeling confined

Wondering whether she had lost her mind or if she was lost in it,
Feeling paralyzed and handicapped was expected on a daily basis,
She was tired and required help, but dare not ask for she could not explain
Why she was filled with fear and doubt, why every day was just a focused blur of faces

Difficult it had all become for her, as she craved for some peace of mind
Longing to find something similar, she kept with herself a glimmer of hope; just a fleck
Every action controlled by the voices inside, a life like this certainly was not living
The cords of her brain slowly began to untangle, only to wrap themselves around her neck

 

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